The History of Marriage

Here are a few interesting facts about the worldwide history of marriage that you may not know!

History of Marriage in Ancient Greece

• In ancient Greece, men were usually in their late 20's-30's when they married, but the bride was only in her late teens. This was to ensure her virginity.
  

• The wife's main duties were to manage the household and bear children, since not having children was looked upon as being very shameful. In fact, if a man was childless and a bachelor, he was scorned and even ineligible for certain jobs.
  

• It was totally acceptable for the husband to use prostitutes and concubines for his erotic needs. Men of ancient Greece often even had intense homosexual relationships with teenage boys!
  

• Divorce was simple; the husband could basically "dismiss" his wife and that was it. However, the wife would be able to take her dowry back with her, so a man generally only divorced his wife if she couldn't produce children or if she had an affair.
  
  

History of Marriage in Ancient Rome

• In very early Roman times, a husband could punish, sell, or even kill his wife and children as he saw fit! Eventually though, wives gained more control over their lives in general.
  
  • There were several methods of getting married and divorced:
    
  • One method was for a couple to simply live together for a year, after which they were considered a married couple. No formal ceremony was required. Getting divorced a few years later was equally informal.
    

  • Another method of getting married was called "by confarreatio" which was a ceremony in front of 10 witnesses and a priest. Usually people from upper classes preferred this method since it was more formal and elaborate and "looked better". Getting divorced from this kind of marriage involved another similar fancy ceremony.
    

• All marriages were monogamous (one man married to one woman at a time) and both the husband and the wife were usually in their late teens when they got married.
  

• Using prostitutes, concubines, and having homosexual relationships were no big deal.
  
  

History of Marriage in Medieval Europe

• Getting married had a lot more to do with the church than it did with the government (as it did in Greece and Rome)
  

• The marriage "deal" was arranged between the groom and the father of the bride. They arranged a price, and in that way, the bride was basically being "sold" into marriage.
  

• The arrangement was a lot more about making strategic economic ties with other families than it was about the couple loving each other.
  

• The down payment was made when the groom-to-be gave the girl the engagement ring. The bigger the better!
  

• The church decided to make getting married a lot trickier by making 3 new rules:
  
  • Couples who were related by blood were not allowed to marry each other. They had to be farther removed than third cousins.
    

  • After the bride and groom were married, none of their relatives were allowed to marry each other since the two were now "one flesh." So even though the next couple might not be related by blood, they were still related by "affinity." So for example, if a guy and a girl got married, and the next year the groom's cousin wanted to marry the bride's cousin (no blood relation), the church would not allow it.
    

  • Godparents, godchildren, and their families were also seen as being related by "spiritual affinity." Therefore they also weren't permitted to marry each other.
    

• As you can imagine, the church usually had to do a lot of investigating of details before the green light was given to a couple to wed.
  

• Although divorce was not allowed by the church, a marriage could be annulled if it was later found that one of these 3 above rules had been broken/overlooked before the wedding.
  
  • As you can imagine, many couples would conveniently discover these problems if the marriage wasn't working out... annulment please!
    

• In the 12th and 13th centuries, it became much more common for marriage to be based on mutual consent - both the groom and the bride had to agree to marry each other... no more "selling the bride"!
  
  

Check out the History of some very Unusual Marriages here

Return from History of Marriage to Advice for Newlyweds Home Page

New! Comments