EVEN More Questions to Ask Before Marriage
Here are some additional questions to ask before marriage:
8) Have you gone for pre marriage counseling together? If not, is your bf/gf/finace willing to go with you? Getting married without having had pre marriage counseling is not a good idea! See why here.
9) Are you and your boyfriend/girlfriend compatible for marriage? People often say that "opposites attract," but when you really think about this in a practical way, your "opposite-ness" can only go so far for your relationship to truly work.Think about it like this: if one of you is super into being fit and healthy, socially outgoing, and likes to save money, how is that ever going to mesh well with the other person if they prefer to sit at home watching TV, keep to themselves, and tend to spend their money more freely? I'm not saying it could never work, but just that it will be a big challenge for you.
Questions to Ask Before Marriage #'s 10-11
10) Why do they want to marry you? Not to scare you, but some people get married so that they can have love and affection because they've rarely or never received it from parents, friends, classmates, etc; in fact, they may have only ever received rejection. To paint you a picture, imagine that your bf/gf is drowning, and YOU are their life preserver- they are clinging to you for dear life. To you, however, this feels like true love because they are all over you ALL the time! This might seem nice for a little while because you are getting so much love and attention, but give it some time and you'll most likely feel more "smothered" than "loved." If this sounds like you and the relationship you're in, I encourage you to examine this about your bf/gf VERY closely before you go through with getting married. Both of you need to be in a healthy place before tying the knot, and a "drowning" partner is not someone who's in a healthy place!
11) Why do you want to marry them? Are you the one who is is "drowning" and is looking to your bf/gf to be your life-preserver, healer, or miracle-worker? Do you have incredibly poor self-esteem, unresolved issues with your parents or other family members, huge issues with loneliness, massive debts, etc? If any of these sound like you, I would strongly encourage you to put marriage (and even dating) on the back-burner for now. Deal with your issues and brokenness FIRST. This may require counseling, facing people from your past, etc, but do what it takes to become a whole and well-adjusted person before getting married. Marriage works BEST when two "whole" people get married. Being married will NOT fix your brokenness... in fact, it will make things more complicated! Take the time NOW to work through these things!
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Go to Questions to Ask Before Marriage #'s 1-4
Go to Questions to Ask Before Marriage #'s 5-7
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